Name: Erica Sims
Born: 1974
Location: Born in Niagara Falls, NY
Organization affiliation: American Atheists
Label: Atheist, Secularist
Former Religious Affiliation: Presbyterian
My Story:
I grew up in a great family – my mom, dad, younger brother and me. My parents took us to church and Sunday school every week but religion wasn’t a big deal in our house, we went to church and believed in god and the bible but didn’t think much about it except for on Sundays. My parents weren’t preachy; no one in my immediate or extended family was. I never doubted the existence of a god until high school, when I started to question it. I think it was more of an act of rebellion than anything at the time, as I retained my belief in god, but it wasn’t anything I thought much about.
I joined the Air Force in 1998 and went to church every now and then, but I started seriously doubting the validity of my religion. I had issues with the church’s views regarding homosexuality and abortion, and I think that’s what started my serious doubts. I wanted so badly to believe, and I felt tremendous guilt for having doubts about the existence of god. I joined a bible study group after my husband and I had two children because I didn’t know much about my religion and I wanted to learn. I thought if I learned about my religion I wouldn’t have doubts about god any more. I was also afraid my doubts would have a negative impact on my children – one of my daughters was about 6 months old and the other was 3 at the time. I didn’t want my struggle with faith to cause them to not have religion in their lives.
Ironically, bible study and church is what started my ascent into atheism. One Sunday I had my 3 year old at the church service with me and the chaplain started to talk about homosexuality and how being gay is a sin, and that homosexuals go to hell. That’s when I decided my kids would not be raised going to a place that will teach them intolerance. That was our last Sunday at church, and the last day I identified myself as a Christian. The more I learned, the less I believed until I didn’t believe in god at all. I still felt guilty for not believing, and did until about a year ago. I also felt it wasn’t fair to my kids if I told them the bible is fictional because I felt like I would be taking something away from them by doing so. That’s no longer the case.
I have embraced reality, and I am proud to be an atheist. I refuse to fill my daughters minds (they are now 7 and 10) with religion as truth, and I actively teach them about evolution and science. If they end up believing in a religion, that’s ok, but I will not teach them that the bible is true. It’s so important to me for my kids to understand it’s ok to not believe, it’s ok to question things they don’t understand or things that don’t make sense, and it’s ok if other people don’t agree with them.
My husband believes in god, and we’ve had a few heated discussions about it, but we accept each other’s beliefs. He knows I do not want our kids being taught that the bible is true, and he’s ok with that. I am very lucky in that my husband, my family and my friends have no problem with my atheism. We all accept each other as we are and respect each other’s right to believe or not to believe in any god.
At first I didn’t want to offend anyone with my atheism so I pretty much kept it to myself. I’m no longer worried about that, and I no longer keep it to myself. I’m not embarrassed or shy about being an atheist, and I love it! I feel so free now, and I love living in reality! I can’t read enough from Richard Dawkins, and I’m currently obsessed with learning all I can about evolution. I now wonder how I ever believed any of the myths taught in church!
It’s my hope that more and more atheists come out and make their atheism known. Don’t let the judgment of others cause you to keep your doubts to yourself. Be true to yourself. Once you “come out” you will feel a sense of freedom you’ve never felt before!
Tagged with: 1974 • American Atheists • atheism • Atheist • New York • Niagara Falls • NY • Presbyterian • Secularist
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This is so right I will repost it:
“I have embraced reality, and I am proud to be an atheist. I refuse to fill my daughters minds (they are now 7 and 10) with religion as truth, and I actively teach them about evolution and science. If they end up believing in a religion, that’s ok, but I will not teach them that the bible is true. It’s so important to me for my kids to understand it’s ok to not believe, it’s ok to question things they don’t understand or things that don’t make sense, and it’s ok if other people don’t agree with them.”
Thank you.
Thank you John
I was really nervous about sending this in, and I was freaking out a little when I found out it was being posted here today!
I am glad you posted this. We have a lot in common. I too am having issues with belief and want my little girl to have religion in her life. I have started Bible study and thus far, not “felt” anything. I want to have faith, I pray for it, but it hasn’t happened. I hope it does. I want a tolerant church as well. So far, my church hasn’t fire and brimstoned homosexuals. I wish that they won’t, as I like the church very much.
I am struggling to find my view on church and God. We will see how it goes.
Like the text.
Erica, I love your story, in fact, our stories have very much in common. I was raised non-demonational Christian but my parents weren’t very “preachy” either. My deconversion process was also similar. I tried to fight it at first because as far as I knew, it was “the devil” tempting me. After about two years of thinking it through, I broke free and began my ascent (another good word choice of yours) into atheism. You’re definitely not alone and I thank you for sharing your story. I think the more of us that come out, the easier it will be for others who are on the fence to do the same. Cheers!
Inability to ask simple questions and non availability of correct personnel to give proper guidance, leads normal / good people to stop believing in GOD. Some still continue to have faith for they are able to notice / be aware of subtle changes in life, is because of presence of GOD. And sadly GOD’s presence or existence can only be experienced and can’t be proven. So one really needs to work hard to experience HIM. The hard work actually is simple work but the truth in life is simpler it is, harder it gets.
How about a life free of sins or mistakes? Sounds simple but if you allow your awareness to grow, you will realize we commit sins or mistakes either in our actions, thoughts or words, EVERYDAY and many times a day.
Leave aside church / temple / bible class etc for, all this is for convenience or for money. Either the priest has a good easy life preaching but not practising or has some vested interests.
GOD is all about ‘The Absolute Truth’. For man to progress further from his physical existence to a spiritual existence, Man first has to pass the test on earth living a life in this materialistic world and is given a free will for it. This free will is basically given to see if you succumb or overcome. The more you overcome the more enlightened you are and the faster you progress. The more you over come, tests become tougher and tougher, like when we start off in School, life is pretty easy but as we progress it gets tougher, so if one wants to study nuclear science and stuff one really needs to work hard, so is, in life as well. The more we don’t see or the more we succumb the more materialistic we become, the more we fall and we are stuck here for ever, birth after birth.
Earth is a bridge for us to cross over in our cosmic journey, but we have chosen to build houses on the bridge and settle here for good.
Don’t complicate life beyond the simple thing it is. Seek GOD in all sincereity and you shall find HIM with or without church / temple / bible.
Read other comments posted, in essays posted after you. Experiences are varied, GOD is ONE.