Name: Ken McNutt II
Born: 1967
Location: Sugar Hill , GA
Label: Atheist (the absence of the belief in God purely based upon the lack of evidence)
Former Religious Affiliation: Various Christian denominations (mostly Catholic)
My Story:
My first religious memories are of going to Sunday School at a Lutheran church a half block away from my home in Detroit when I was six years old. There was no reason to doubt any of the stories from the Bible that I was told. Why would they lie? At that age, it seemed possible that God could read every thought I had or that a man could live for three days inside a whale. Why not?
Fast forwarding a few years, I entered 5th grade at St. Joan of Arc Catholic School in St. Clair Shores Michigan. Since I was nine years old and hadn’t taken my First Communion, I was given an “accelerated” course by the school librarian. That’s when something very interesting happened. The nun made a statement which really took me by surprise. She said, “If God didn’t exist, I would lie, steal, and kill people. If there was no Heaven or Hell, people would just do whatever they wanted.”
Even at that young age I thought she was wrong. I believed even if God didn’t exist, it was still good to do good things. It made me stop and think, “The only reason this person is being nice to me is because she is expecting to be rewarded for that later.” That thought was disappointing to me. Why couldn’t someone’s default stance be, “Let’s be nice to other people without the expectation of a reward.” Couldn’t she understand that it is good to be good anyway?
During the four years of Catholic school I attended, I read large chunks of the Bible in my free time, attended Mass usually twice a week, went to Confession a couple of times, and was Confirmed by the Cardinal. For the amount of time and effort I put into it, I wasn’t getting much out of it.
Again, fast forwarding a few more years, during 10th grade a friend told me, “People believe in religion because that’s what they want to believe.” Her statement hit me like a ton of bricks. It seemed so obvious that she was right. It didn’t matter to the average person what was actually true. All that mattered was what felt good or comforting. It was at that moment that I became Agnostic without knowing the term or the definition. I instantly became unsure of everything I believed in the past about religion and God. That was the biggest moment of apostasy in my life.
Throughout my life after that moment, I would occasionally search for the truth just because I was curious. If religion came up in random conversation, I didn’t try to avoid it. I gave my opinion without having any “proof”. I tried to educate myself about all the religions in the world. If a Jehovah’s Witness knocked on my door, I let them in. I was always able to poke holes in their logic without much effort.
Then something unexpected happened this past year. A couple of Jehovah’s Witnesses knocked on my door and I let them in as usual. We sat down, started talking about the Bible, and I asked them my usual nagging questions. Surprisingly, no matter what question I asked them, they instantly gave me a chapter and verse reply. Granted, they weren’t giving me answers that made me all of a sudden believe that everything they said was right, but it did one very important thing. It forced me to find the answers to the questions that had been nagging me almost my entire life. What do I really believe in and why? “Not being sure” was suddenly not good enough anymore.
I dug deeper into the Bible than I ever had before. Who wrote it, when, and why? How was the whole thing assembled? What books were not included and why? I went through every argument for and against the existence of God that I could find. The more I dug into it, the more it shocked me what I had not known my entire life. The very foundation of Christianity was built upon a lie. Christianity throughout history and as we know it today has more to do with Paul than Jesus himself. Ironically, Paul never even met Jesus while he walked the Earth. Mistranslations, insertions, contradictions, and a lack of historical evidence affect the entire theology of the Bible. I found answers, but not necessarily the ones that I was expecting.
So now, using the information that I’ve found, how do I label myself? Can I prove that God doesn’t exist? No, but that is not how I define Atheism for myself. My definition of Atheism answers the question, “Do I believe in God?”, and that answer is no.
In the future, when thinking about the universe, I will use logic instead of superstition as much as humanly possible. I believe human progress would benefit if religion faded from existence.
If you don’t believe in God, please consider sharing your story with the world if you haven’t already.
Tagged with: 1967 • catholic • Ken • Lutheran • Sugar Hill
9 Comments
Leave a Comment
Donate to our cause
Sign up for our mailing list.
Online Store
Get Social With Us
Hi.
Actually it sounds like you’re a pretty reasonable person. You may want to check out 1 Corinthians 9:1. You mention that Paul never met Jesus. But there he declares that he did.
And when there were divisions about who was greater Paul always made note that he was nobody and nothing, but that Jesus was the one whom he imitated and followed. In fact he stated:
(1 Corinthians 11:1) Become imitators of me, even as I am of Christ.
Everything Paul did and said in the Holy Scriptures was guided and directed by holy spirit, and was indeed in imitation of the founder and rock of Christianity, Jesus Christ.
Now you have observed that Christendom itself is not a follower Christ, and you would be quite accurate. But that too was foretold by Jesus himself, and also the apostle Paul.
Of course, going back to Paul and his encounter with Jesus, Paul did not see Jesus in his human form. For by the the time he became acquainted with Jesus, the son of God had been risen from the dead in an immortal spirit body and had returned to the invisible heavenly realm where God and his angels reside. So Paul saw Jesus as he was in spirit. In fact Jesus was so brilliant that he blinded Saul when he looked on him.
Now, we do have manuscripts that date back to very early history. The earliest ones all the way to the late half of the first century. It is true, there have been several verses that the Catholic Church, for example, added, they are very obvious because they do contradict the rest of scripture, and of course, are shown to be fraudulent by means of exaiming earlier manuscripts shows up their forgeries. But that does not invalidate the sanctity of scripture. It only shows the corruption of an apostate Church.
Comparing later manuscripts, as well, with the Dead Sea Scrolls, for example, show us that even though hundreds and even thousands of years have passed, the scriptures are still unchanged. We can have confidence that they have been persevered in tact for us today.
Anyway, that’s my two cents. I’m sure you’ve formed your own opinions, and take it for what it’s worth.
A Jehovah’s Witness.
Thank you for assuming I am a reasonable person Leon.
First off, I tried to word my essay so it could not be misunderstood. When I said, “Paul never even met Jesus while he walked the Earth”, the “he” I refer to is Jesus not Paul. I do not count a blinding light as meeting Jesus in the flesh.
If the message of Jesus was so important to Paul, why didn’t he immediately seek out the people who knew Jesus in the flesh first-hand? Instead, he waited three years to meet with the early Jerusalem church.
The answer is, Paul didn’t care exactly what Jesus taught. Paul changed Christianity to fit what suited him. He was in direct conflict with the early Christian church in many ways.
Before Paul, Christianity was just a sect of Judaism. They followed Jewish laws and went to the Temple. The message of Jesus was only meant for Jews.
The first gospel written chronologically is generally regarded as Mark. The original version of Mark ends at the empty tomb. The resurrection was added later.
If Jesus taught that his death was imminent, why did the apostles flee at the crucifixion?
The answer is, Jesus did not know about his impending death.
Everything in Christianity is based on the Atonement. The Atonement is Paul’s invention. Paul even created the name “Jesus Christ” as a proper name. Before that, the normal usage would have been “Jesus the Christ”. “Christ” is a title not a name.
In my opinion it’s very interesting to see how the gospels evolved from the first (Mark) to the last (John). It’s not just four versions of the same thing. Each version builds on the next in greater detail generally speaking. Wouldn’t the version with most detail be the first one?
Most people who call themselves Christians base their lives around what Paul believed and said more than Jesus.
For actual words of Jesus that few Christians know about, I recommend the gospel of Thomas. I believe it is more accurate and historical than the gospel of John.
Thank you, Brian. More people should take the time to sort out what they really believe. It feels good when you finally settle these important question for yourself.
Leon
I saw Poseidon yesterday in my dream, does that make it true? The mere fact that the people of the great religions “talked to god” (Or the devil) after having starved for a prolonged time, almost proves how crazy it is.
If I claimed a new religion after having starved myself in the desert would you believe me? Yet you believe the bible, simply because its old?
The bible also says that no person (after the great flood) will ever be older than 120 years of age: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oldest_people this again proves that its a lie. If the story of Noah were true we are ALL a product of recent incest, and explaining black, asian, caucasian, native american and all the other races fails.
There are so many holes in the bible that it’s amazing anybody who actually read the thing believes in it.
I will end my comment with this, its a bit over the edge and dramatic, but it sums up how ridiculous it actually is:
http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_aWflL2jDpWU/SbvSemsFCQI/AAAAAAAAEqg/6hb73rtQe2I/s400/cosmicjewishzombie.jpg
The irony of using the Bible as reference material to an Atheist.I could just as easily quote Star Wars,and be just as close to the truth.I’m happy to see you search for what you truely believe,not just what was programmed into you.
I can’t say that “I don’t believe in God” as that implies there is a God, but I just don’t believe in what he or she says, etc.
I’ll will say that I don’t believe in the existence of any diety/gods as the data, evidence, and information simply does not exist.
It’s easy for people to say that so and so book says God or Jesus said this and that, but they fail to give us a summary as to what their definition of a “god” or “Jesus” is or what they are. It is up to those making the claim that something exists/existed to proof that claim, then maybe then they can start sharing who said or wrote what along with the proper, credible citations.
Leon,
The dead sea scrolls refer only to the old testament and say nothin about jesus. Their accuracy to the english translation only confirms the worst parts of the bible were translated properly demonstrating a immoral monster of a god who commanded genocide and human sacrifice. Not to mention there is not a shred of archeological proof that demonstrates moses walk through the desert with his followers. So there is no mOre reason to believe the divine assertions of the bible than to believe in sirens from the odyssey.
As far as the new testament, they are essentially the only documents that claim jesus even existed. Im not saying he didnt, but the evidence is far from solid that he did. None of the books of accounts of jesus were written during his supposed lifetime and as you said, none of the authors actually met him. There is only a claim he saw a ghost of jesus.
With the existence of the man god even have lived so flimsy, there is absOlutely no reason to accept the miracle claims of the bible. Or the god claims.
Leon, hallucinations don’t count as “meeting” someone. Religious visions of dead people are common all around the world, and I’m betting you consider most of them dreams or hallucinations that were mistaken for reality. If we take seriously an ancient superstitious guy who fell of his horse and had a hallucination, we will need to take seriously countless other contradictory claims.
I have never read the Bible and never plan on wasting my time with it. There are so many other books of fact that I would rather spend my time on. Imagine how much better the world would be if the people who wasted their time memorizing Bible passages and going to Church would use that time to study science and maybe even come up with ideas and experiments to further science!